The Sacredness Of Rest

Summary

The episode of "Speaking of Faith", Bishop DeDe Duncan-Probe discusses the essential role of rest in our lives and its connection to faith. She emphasizes the importance of intentionality in creating space for rest, the need to listen for God amidst the noise of daily life, and the responsibilities of being a bishop. The discussion highlights how rest is not merely a break from work but a vital component of spiritual renewal and community well-being.

Takeaways

• Rest is essential to a life well lived.
• We need rest for our bodies to heal.
• Rest is not just for rest's sake; it is for renewal.
• Intentionality in rest can lead to greater engagement in life.
• Listening for God requires carving out quiet spaces.
• Being busy is often seen as a value, but it can lead to overwork.
• Prayer can take many forms, including doing nothing.
• Creating space for rest can enhance our spiritual lives.
• The role of a bishop involves significant preparation and responsibility.
• We need to support each other in our journeys toward rest.

Chapters

00:00 The Importance of Faith Conversations

02:52 Understanding the Need for Rest

06:09 Intentionality in Rest and Renewal

08:59 Listening for God in a Noisy World

11:52 The Role of a Bishop and the Weight of Responsibility

14:57 Creating Space for Rest in Daily Life

18:00 The Intersection of Rest and Spirituality

21:09 The Call to Rest as a Community

24:10 Embracing Rest as a Path to Renewal

AI Disclosure: To support our staff in their limited time, many of our episode summaries are first generated by AI and then edited by the Communications Director to accurately reflect and preview our podcast episodes.

Transcript

Bishop DeDe (00:02.198)
Welcome to the podcast. I'm so glad we're going to speak of faith today. What do you believe and how do we talk about it? We've lost our abilities in many ways to speak about our faith. so welcome to a place of safety where we can think about and learn to speak about our faith. My name is DeDe Duncan-Probe. I am the Episcopal Bishop of central New York. I'm joined by Adam Eichelberger, who is our director of communications. And we're going to talk today about something that's very important.

and essential to a life well lived and actually a fundamental part of faith, which is rest. It is good to note that in our tradition, in our Hebrew scriptures, in many traditions, we're called to Sabbath. It is one of the commandments of God that we have Sabbath, that we take time. And so for us often,

to keep the Sabbath day holy for many years was associated with one thing, which was to worship God on a particular day. I want to talk a little bit, broaden that out a bit to this understanding that, you know, that God rested, that for God it was a priority. So I think whenever it's a priority for God, it probably should be a priority for us, that we have moments of rest. And this time, this season of the year,

is a time when, you know, vacation time and, summertime when the living is easy to quote the wonderful song, where we, shift the pace of life a bit, hopefully, and to talk about what it means to rest, how it is essential. I hear people a lot of times talk about, have trouble, you know, I have trouble sleeping at night or I didn't get enough sleep last night. I didn't get enough sleep last night.

How many days in a row do we say to someone, well, I didn't get enough sleep last night, or I wish I'd slept more. It's not that often I hear anyone say, you know, I had a good night's sleep last night and I'm ready to go. I got all the sleep I need. I'm totally ready. That doesn't happen as much. In fact, years ago was at a store, a grocery store, and I heard someone say to someone else, how are you doing? They said, I'm great. I'm so busy. can, I barely have time to sleep. And I thought, wow.

Bishop DeDe (02:24.448)
I'm so great because I can barely sleep. That might not be the right direction. Our bodies need sleep. Our minds need sleep. It is a true thing that when someone is tired, they're more prone to be depressed. They're more prone to be suspicious of other people's motivations. It's just a natural thing that happens. Then of course, I'm not talking about organic depression.

And, but in this case, it can cause our moods to slip. We need rest for our bodies to heal, for our bodies to function, and it is part of a life well lived. So, in speaking of faith, how do we speak about our need for rest? One, it's to value that we are human and that we need this because it is how God has created us. honoring the creator that we honor our being.

and our spiritual life as well as our physical life. And then to focus on the fact that rest is more than just sleeping every night. Rest is more than time off or downtime. In fact, sometimes the way we spend our downtime isn't really exactly restful. It's more just, you know, kind of zoning out. It's not exactly restful, which is why at the end of it, we sometimes don't feel very rested.

Because we just zoned out for a day and sort of mindlessly watch TV and noise and all the stuff is coming in and we just kind of zone out, zone out, zone out. And then we come back to consciousness and keep going, but we don't feel renewed. Fundamental to rest is hopefully an understanding of renewal. That rest is not just for rest's sake, rest is for us to feel better, more hopeful, more engaged.

to have more energy for things. So when we rest, to be intentional about it. Maybe our first step is that we need to sleep more each night and prep for that and make sure that before bed we have a routine that allows us to rest fully, that we can sufficiently dream and cleanse our mental scape as it were. And then when we awake, to have time in our life each day,

Bishop DeDe (04:48.11)
to reconnect with those things that matter most to us. Going for a walk as a part of re-situating our thoughts. Sitting for a minute and turning off all noise and having some time for complete silence or a time when we listen only to birds and not a whole bunch of other noisiness in life. Some people will do.

you know, where they put in the noise canceling headphones and have real sensory, moments where they just totally take away all of it. they just let themselves relax for a minute and restore and renew to have a, a reset. need to, just like your computer, we need to be rebooted and so to reboot by resting the other, other forms of rest can be, in talking with a friend.

and talking and having conversations that are not about fixing the world, all that we're anxious about, or something that brings us down, but to actually speak about who do I believe Jesus is? How have I experienced God lately? To be reflective and to be learning. To have that rest for ourselves that at the end of it, we feel renewed and more capable, more able.

to live the life that we feel called to live rather than less. And when those things happen where life is hard and sometimes life is very challenging, when we're in the midst of one of those times where we're really feeling beaten down by life itself, where it's just not going well, what we tend to do is we double down and we're like, well, then I'm just gonna work harder.

Well, then I won't sleep now. Well, then I'm going to eat badly. Well, I'm just going to do all these bad habits because I'm feeling really scrunched by life and rather to say, okay, I'm feeling really scrunched by life. I need the ballast of taking a minute. I'm going to take five minutes in the middle of this chaos, put on the noise canceling headphones, close my eyes and re-sync and let my thoughts kind of win themselves out.

Bishop DeDe (07:04.596)
All of us need those opportunities for renewal, especially with, excuse me, all of us need time for renewal, especially in times where it's hard and stressful. Jesus and the Gospel of Mark is such a wonderful exemplar, always Jesus, I always go to Jesus, of course, but in the Gospel of Mark,

Jesus goes out to talk and then what does Jesus do? He withdraws. He goes out to speak and he withdraws. All through the Gospel of Mark you have this wonderful pattern of rest and self-care and then going out to serve. Rest and self-care, going out to serve. And on the boat with the apostles in the midst of the storm, in the midst of the big tumult and all that's going on, where's Jesus? He's asleep in the back. He's taking a break. And then they're like, my gosh, there's this storm.

Don't you even know who I am? I'm God, I'm with you. So in the midst of the storm to know that God is with you and to follow the example of Jesus and rest, to take a minute to say, you know, I'm not gonna be able to fix anything if I'm this tired. And so I'm gonna do the things I have to do to make sure that people are safe and things are taken care of, but then I'm gonna take a break. And when I come back to this, then we'll pick it up anew.

So in this season, in the summer, when we have time, hopefully, and maybe we have, I think it's an illusion sometimes, we have no more time in the summer than we did. It's just during the other seasons we were doing other things. But now we have this time to be intentional about resting ourselves, to be intentional about building habits that allow us greater capacity for engagement and allow us to step away from

You know, this, the push toward busy-ness being a value to being, being a value to be-ing not do-ings. And so I encourage you listener to think about how we talk about our lives that encourages us to rest. When we talk about, this is great. I'm so busy. Well, that's not encouraging us to be a being. It's encouraging us to overwork and over function. When we say things like, I have to do this. have to do this.

Bishop DeDe (09:29.954)
Hmm. Well, what's God calling you to do? And maybe what you think you have to do is the thing that's actually getting in the way of the thing that's a gift to do. And so as we think about speaking of our faith and in this season of the year, I think it is so important to be speaking words of rest, to be speaking words of honoring and to be to be more intentional about our own Sabbath taking.

to really recognize God's calling us to be whole persons and to be attentive. So Adam, I've talked a bit about all the rest and everything. How does this strike you and what questions might come to your mind about the subject of rest?

Adam Eichelberger (10:17.264)
For me, it's really easy to get caught up in the day-to-day routine of everything. It's really easy for me to get thrown into, there's this thing that I learned about a long time ago about the axis of things that are important and urgent. And I feel like sometimes, especially in the things that I do in my work and in my personal life, that everything seems to be firmly in the thing that is both important and urgent. And I'm always feeling spread pretty thin.

Bishop DeDe (10:32.322)
Mm-hmm.

Adam Eichelberger (10:45.96)
And so I I have a hard time separating myself from all the stuff that's going on and Janet who is a listener actually asked a question and Janet I'm going to piggyback off your question because I feel like both of us have the same thoughts on this And Janet wanted to ask what does it mean to listen to God listen? Excuse me. Let me try that again What does it mean to listen for God in a noisy world? So what does that look like for us? What are the ways like you?

started to talk about a little bit, what are the ways that we can kind of carve out that space to really listen for what God is doing in the things that are happening all around us?

Bishop DeDe (11:22.426)
such a great question, Janet. mean, really, and listener, as you, you know, what are some ways you've learned to carve out space? You know, we claim busyness a lot, which a lot of us are, I can, you know, I'm a bishop of a diocese that's thriving. I have a robust schedule and there are moments that if I make use of them, and some of it is that intentionality of stopping and saying, okay.

When I first wake up, what is the pattern of my morning? And to work on it. It's not like I've done the same thing for 50 years and this is how I do my mornings. Well, maybe that isn't working. Maybe when we first get up, we change the pattern and say, okay, this meets my objectives for the day. I need space for, while I have my coffee, I'm not gonna be watching the news, but I have my coffee and sit on the back deck this time of year.

and listen to the birds and have a moment of quiet. I'm driving to work in the midst of traffic and there's all the noise and there's the things going on. I'm going to turn the radio off. And in my car, even though there's all the traffic and all the noise, I'm going to have a little bit of space. I'm just going to push back a bit on all the noisiness of life. Or I'm going to play some music that's very calming and quiet that draws me to a different mindset to utilize.

the resources we have, whether it's a moment of silence or whether it's going for a walk in a wooded area or whether it's sitting quietly and drawing. To create that space requires intentionality. And all of us have that ability, no matter what is happening in our lives, to create intentional spaces of rest and quiet.

And we've talked before, I think I talk about it all the time, to pray as we breathe and to allow ourselves to take deep, full breaths. When we feel stress, that is a great way of reclaiming rest is to take 10 deep breaths while we're in the midst of whatever else is going on. I am a big proponent of moving TVs out of main rooms of houses. If you have the space and you can.

Bishop DeDe (13:48.824)
to change the layout of your living area so that the TV isn't the most prominent thing that doesn't center the house, but is something that is off to the side. Or music, to bring music back into the house in ways that are helpful, where it's not driving you to more anxious living, but rather to a calm.

And I will point out funny, a little aside, often we think we'll put on classical music. Okay. They use classical music in movies to create stress. So you can put on some classical music, but you have to really watch yourself. It's a Wagner or something else you're going to have to, that's not going to be your go-to. So pay attention to what it is that you put on. You know, if you're watching the news, what kind of news is it news where people are yelling at each other or is it someone just dispensing what happened today?

We have a lot that we can draw on to change how our lives are flowing.

Adam Eichelberger (14:49.846)
yeah. And one of the things I can't remember who I heard say this one time, but there is something also very sacred in the doing of nothing.

Bishop DeDe (14:57.898)
it's time on it. You know, we need to embrace whimsy and to say, you know what? When I'm doing nothing, I'm doing something. When I'm sitting and looking at the birds and have my cup of coffee and someone says, quick, you know, we need to come and do the dishes or whatever it is. I'll come in in five minutes. Well, you're not, you're sitting there doing nothing. Nope. I'm sitting here being and reconnecting with God. I'm sitting here.

remembering that I am God's beloved and my life is not defined by doing the dishes. That's a part of my life. My life is defined by how I live and I'm choosing today to live intentionally my best life and the people around me being invited into that with us.

Adam Eichelberger (15:46.12)
Oh yeah. And I think that one time when I was younger, heard somebody, can't remember if they were a priest or who they were, but they were talking about when we carve out that intentional time for prayer. Very similar to what you were saying, but they took an inner direction I really didn't enjoy the more I thought about it, which was like, well, we got to give up the time listening to the news or the podcast or the audio book or the music or watching the TV or playing video games or whatever it is that brings us.

these things that bring us some joy and bring us some rest, that those times need to be taken away for prayer. And it was almost kind of like this image of like, now I got to get on my knees and I got to pray a bunch of rosaries, or I got to, which none of those things are bad, listener. Please don't interpret my words as like you shouldn't be praying in those times. also, the thing that stood out to me when he talked about Jesus retreating is there's,

Bishop DeDe (16:26.862)
Mm.

Mm-mm.

Adam Eichelberger (16:39.29)
an implication and sometimes he's even said that he goes away to pray, but there's no prescription for what's happening in that space. Like it's really helpful for me to just zone out, not like or take a nap or whatever. And that those things have meaning and purpose in my life and that they don't always have to be filled with another thing that that those things can be prayer unto themselves.

Bishop DeDe (16:51.79)
Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (16:59.853)
No.

Bishop DeDe (17:03.512)
And let me say, listen, I mean, back to Janet's question, schedule time. I mean, put, you know, my calendar is filled with meetings. Schedule a meeting with yourself and have it be a meeting with Jesus. You don't even to tell people what it is, but to schedule time for that. I think what I hear in what you're saying, Adam, is this idea of

Anytime we're not on our knees praying some catechistic prayer is a waste of our time. That is not true because Jesus didn't approach life that way. When we withdraw, maybe we do need to withdraw to take a nap. Maybe we withdraw to do some puzzling because in that calmness of putting puzzle pieces together, it gives us a space to allow our

Adam Eichelberger (17:36.936)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (18:00.558)
our anxieties, our feelings, all the stuff to sort of find a place to be. Some people find doing the dishes to be therapeutic or doing the laundry or making order out of chaos and to quietly do it or listen to music and have that be a time. I've known people, I actually had a very good friend who loved to do the dishes because that's when she prayed for people. And so as she was doing dishes, she would pray for the people who were sick or other people. And it was a physical way.

of kind of living into the prayer. So when we take away those things, because prayer isn't sitting also, we probably should do a podcast on this, sitting in a space saying sentences to God, prayer is being with God and holding our cares before God. And sometimes there's just no language for it. When I have found myself at the really difficult times in my life,

Sometimes my prayers is really much more contemplative to sit with God and hold it before God and listen for God. So to utilize our life as prayer and more and more everything we do, whether it's driving a car, whether it's working at the office, whether it's in conversation with other people, to be intentionally prayerful through all of it as an offering of this is how I'm spending my best day is

in relationship with God in these people and situations.

Adam Eichelberger (19:31.162)
I'm going to, I'm going to admit that those of you who listen in audio only, you missed out on something. And if you watch the video on our YouTube, you'll see this happen. Bishop Deedee mentioned scheduling a meeting with yourself, which I had never heard before. And I know it seems kind of like a little like callous and cold, but as somebody who has invested a whole ton of time and bought a lot of books and done a lot of research into like self-improvement and all these kinds of things. I'm like,

Bishop DeDe (19:36.622)
you

Bishop DeDe (19:44.525)
you

Adam Eichelberger (19:56.966)
That's a really good way to build a habit. Like before it becomes a habit for me, like I gotta schedule a meeting with myself, which is a really good way for me to be focused on things like rest. Now you started to talk about this a little bit Bishop, and it's very prescient that you talked about this, cause we received a question from Sherry and Sherry wanted to ask you, and this is a good one on the topic of rest. What are some things that you wish more people understood about being a Bishop?

Bishop DeDe (20:01.848)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (20:28.798)
goodness, a whole list comes up. Well, you know, most people don't understand what being a bishop even is really, you know, or means.

One of the things that probably is really important that I find that I even am always learning when I look at my calendar for a day and I see one meeting is Tempting for me to think why am I not busier? Until I remember I need to write three sermons. I need to read some papers that came in I need to look at the budget and I need to Assess some things that are happening. I need to do some research on one of our parishes because there's a situation

that needs to be looked into, I need to write these emails to these people who are waiting to hear from me. And to see on that calendar that an empty space isn't empty, that that's actually, now I can actually do the work that I have to do. And that my schedule is not reflected in the number of meetings I've planned or number of Zooms I've had. It's reflected in those

bigger things, being prepared for preaching, going over liturgies and checking and making sure things are done. So I think one of the things people don't realize is how much of my time is spent preparing for things and looking, engaged with counseling, and then also learning about what's happening in the wider world. I need to be up to date on.

how things are in a particular village in New York or how things are for people in a particular region. you know, there's a lot more to it than just when people see me on a Sunday. There's been a lot of prep time that went into that.

Adam Eichelberger (22:22.18)
And also like, it's not just like reaching the, the highest level of an organization. You know, it's like a lot of times, cause so many of us have jobs where we get hired and we get promotions. And with that promotion comes a little bit more responsibility and more pay or whatever. But I think that one of the things that's most telling to me about seeing how bishops operate, because not just working with you, but also understanding how bishops within the church operate that like this.

Bishop DeDe (22:30.08)
Mm, no.

Bishop DeDe (22:36.205)
Mm-hmm.

Adam Eichelberger (22:51.186)
First of all, it's not really like a promotion. And it comes with a lot of weight. It is a really heavy burden to undertake. Whether we're talking about the Bishop of a diocese or when you even look lately when you see the election of a new Pope in the Catholic Church, like, holy smoke, like this is a lot of responsibility and there's a lot that goes into it.

Bishop DeDe (22:54.729)
No, no, no, no. Yes.

Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (23:16.718)
There is, and you want to do a great job, but you also realize that you're completely incapable of it because so much of it isn't really what I do. There's a lot of referential pieces to it where I have influence and I have the ability to speak to things and similar to the Pope, but it's dependent on other people like on you.

know, communications at the diocese, why wasn't this communicated or something? Well, because you're communicating all the other things and you're doing all the stuff. All of us are part of and intrinsic to what's happening. It isn't one person. And so, you know, it's always an invitation to all of us to be the church. It's not about one person. And I have to say about with callings and we can talk about this in another episode.

You know, this idea of promotion that if you're a lay person, you get promoted to deacon or get promoted to priest or get promoted. No, it's about calling. They're, you know, all of us are part of the body of Christ. so, you know, Corinthians, who can say that I'm a hand or the head or we all are part of what's happening together. And we need each of us to be who God's called us to be for the body of Christ to function as it does. And.

part of that body of Christ, getting back to the topic for today, is rest. We need each other to rest and be our own agents of rest. We need to make sure that when we come to the table, whatever table that may be, whether it's as a person in our family, whether it's a person at our church or in our work, that we're coming with our best selves and that we're paying attention to how we're talking that encourages us and those around us to rest.

Adam Eichelberger (25:09.64)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (25:09.942)
And I will close with this illustration because when I first became a bishop, I realized very quickly that I needed to carve out a day for a Sabbath time, for time for me to rest, but not time off. Time for me to prepare for sermons and to do the work. know, a 10-minute sermon can take hours for me to prepare because I need to do a lot of searching around on it and really putting it together.

So I needed space for that. I designated Thursdays are my Sabbath day. And I don't schedule anything in the mornings on Thursdays because I like to spend a couple of hours praying in silence, quietly. then reading scripture and then starting to look at the sermons. And then in the afternoon, if I need to schedule meetings, I do that in the afternoons. But it's really essential that I take that time.

Right off when I announced this and said this, there were folks who were really questioned if I was just trying to get two days off a week or what was I doing with that time. And then I really got some pushback on it where it was like, no, we don't really want you to do that. You need to be meeting and doing, doing, And I would say, no, I need that space so that I can be prepared for Sunday and so that I can make sure that I'm prayerful and that I'm in touch with God. And.

So I would sometimes on those Thursdays or Thursday is always the day when the inspiration comes because it's when I've created the space for it. It's when I'm praying and I'll be praying on Thursday and I think, and it comes to me. I don't think it. It's like they'll all the best ideas usually happen on Thursday. And then I'll tell people I during my prayer time on Thursday, this I was inspired by this during my prayer time on Thursday. I this came to me.

Because I want people to know that in your own life, when you make those spaces, people may question you and say, you're just not working hard enough. But for them to understand that what work means is that you have space for rest and an intentional space to attune yourself to God's channel, if you will. And so that you can really hear and know and draw more deeply, because it's God at work in us.

Bishop DeDe (27:32.16)
And that's what being a church means. And so perhaps after all this talking, what people need to know is that to be a bishop, to be a follower of Jesus is to create space for rest in our life and intentionality that will fuel us and that we'll be able and be ready and rested for the work God calls to us and to do in us. this is now I turn hand the speaking to you. The microphone is yours now, dear listener.

Send in your questions or your comments or feedback. I'm always interested in what Has struck you in this and then also for you to now take this topic of rest Into your own life and into your own space and to speak with others. How do we rest? What is the meaning of rest in your life? And how does rest help you to follow Jesus more fully and live the calling of God in you? May you be blessed and be a blessing and I look forward to speaking with you

Soon. Take good care.