Advent - Help Is Coming

Summary

In this episode of Speaking of Faith, Bishop DeDe and Adam explore the significance of the Advent season, emphasizing the importance of preparation, mourning, and hope. They discuss how Advent serves as a time to reflect on our longings and the presence of God in our lives, especially during difficult times. The conversation encourages listeners to embrace their feelings of grief and longing, recognizing that these emotions can lead to deeper connections with God and others. The episode concludes with a call to action for listeners to prepare their hearts for the coming of Jesus and to live intentionally during this sacred season.

Takeaways

• Advent is a time for preparation and reflection.
• Mourning is a natural part of the Advent experience.
• Longing can be a sign of hope and growth.
• God meets us in our vulnerability and grief.
• Emmanuel means 'God with us' in our struggles.
• Our 'yes' to God can lead to new possibilities.
• Advent offers a chance for a spiritual do-over.
• Community support is vital during times of mourning.
• Intentionality in our faith can bring peace and joy.
• We are invited to share our experiences and prepare our hearts.

Chapters

00:00 Welcome to the Advent Season
06:05 Longing and Hope
13:59 The Power of Yes
22:01 Living into the Season

AI Disclosure: To support our staff in their limited time, many of our episode summaries are first generated by AI and then edited by the Communications Director to accurately reflect and preview our podcast episodes.

Transcript

Bishop DeDe (00:02.072)
Hello friends, welcome to Speaking of Faith, a podcast about how we talk about those things that matter most to us. Wherever you are on your journey of faith, you're welcome to be part of this conversation, to add to it your own thoughts about your faith and what is relevant and vibrant about your faith, and to come and to be part of this conversation. My name is DeDe Duncan-Probe. I'm the Episcopal Bishop of Central New York.

that area between Canada and Pennsylvania, Utica and Elmira in the state of New York. And I'm joined by Adam Eichelberger, our Director of Communications. The intent of this podcast is to welcome you into a conversation and encourage you to have conversations. So I hope that this podcast will not only spark a thoughtfulness, but also encourage you to speak with those you love and people around you.

and seek to understand more how our faith informs how we live. Now, in the podcast, we have been talking in recent weeks about Christian nationalism. We've talked about putting on the whole armor of God as a way of shoring up our own hearts, as a way of finding stability and the ability to stand in times that are uncertain. And so today, we're gonna take those conversations.

and allow them to inform how we're entering into the season of Advent. Now, not all Christians and especially not all people are aware of the season of Advent in the Christian calendar. It is a season that for a while kind of fell out of favor in some areas of Christianity, but I think it's such an essential season because it's about preparing our hearts for Jesus' coming, the Advent of the Lord.

It is also, I think, interesting and helpful to talk about why Advent begins the church season. This is our season of the new year in the church. There was a time when the new year, when the church saw itself as beginning at the feast of the Annunciation, that moment when Mary says, yes, I will be God's handmaiden. I will say yes to God's purposes. Then at a certain point, someone said, you know,

Bishop DeDe (02:22.882)
We need to back this up to our own preparation for our own yes, that we are going to be part of what God is doing, that God is inviting us into a relationship, inviting us into a way of life that we want to respond to. If you have heard people say Christmas is too commercial or it just gets so busy or I don't like Christmas because it's just so much pressure, welcome.

This conversation may be very helpful and reframe this for you. Christmas is about the incarnation of God, Jesus' birth. It's about a baby being born. Advent is about preparing our hearts and having clarity and an opportunity to think about these things. It is true that between December 1st and the 24th or 25th,

Adam Eichelberger (02:50.439)
Hahaha

Bishop DeDe (03:18.594)
There's a lot to do and people can get very caught up in the busy busyness. My invitation to you in speaking of faith is to take a time to step back and say, what does this actually mean to you? During the season of Advent in the Christian church, we often sing, come, come, Emmanuel. Some churches even sing one verse a week as we're preparing our hearts. I want to read the words to the first verse.

O come, O come, Emmanuel and ransom captive Israel that mourns in a lonely exile here until the son of God appears. Rejoice, rejoice, Emmanuel shall come to thee, O Israel. Now, Emmanuel, God with us, what it actually, the word means, and this, I think it's very important to hear in this that mourns in lonely exile here.

I don't know about you, but in this time, I think a lot of us are mourning. We're mourning a peaceful world. We're mourning America being unified and not divided. We're mourning seeing things that we have held dear become changed or morphed into something we don't approve of. We mourn Christianity being appropriated by this sort of nationalistic fervor. We mourn

Adam Eichelberger (04:24.388)
Mm.

Bishop DeDe (04:48.934)
so many things and in the midst of it, people. People who have died this year. People who are no longer around our Thanksgiving tables. People who will not be gathering with us physically at Christmas, but who continue to be loved and we continue to have a relationship though we do not see them any longer. So this season, there is a real loneliness and advent because it speaks to what is going to be.

not necessarily what has been. We're preparing our hearts for the coming of Jesus, which in and of itself speaks to that we're waiting for something. And then that tension of waiting and grieving, there can be a loneliness and isolation. It is not surprising, therefore, that a lot of us feel alone at Christmas. A lot of us don't feel really like being super happy or clappy because we're so attentive to.

the ways in which we're actually grieving and the ways in which we are mourning something. I wonder, and Adam, I wanna welcome you into this. Are there things that come to your mind as you think about this sort of grieving and then welcoming Jesus and the interplay between those?

Adam Eichelberger (06:06.05)
yeah, absolutely Bishop. I think the first, I've got like kind of a handful of questions that have come to mind as I'm hearing you talk about this and as we were praying about entering into this Advent season. So I think if we can, I'm just going to ask you a couple of these questions. Some of them are things around my mind. A couple of them are things that a few of our listeners had mentioned to us that if we could just talk about those and I could ask you those and we can maybe help focus ourselves for this Advent season. So

Bishop DeDe (06:13.056)
You

Adam Eichelberger (06:35.928)
When you talk about longing, what does longing look like for us right now? And what can we do during this Advent season as we address our longing?

Bishop DeDe (06:38.67)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (06:48.124)
that's such a good question. And I want to confess right up front, not sure I have the total answer to that one. Cause it's such a deep question. Each of us may be longing for something slightly different from one another. Some of us may be longing for new love or some of us are longing for silence for, know, 26 hours in a day, not 20, you know, so because we need more time.

Adam Eichelberger (07:08.45)
Hahaha

Bishop DeDe (07:15.82)
But I think that sense of longing speaks to that somewhere in us there's hope. If we know that we're not, if there's no hope, we don't long for anything. If there's no sense of there could be something better out there, then we just sort of, you know, sit where we are. But the fact that we're longing for something and that there's a sense of sort of agitation, while it may not feel exactly comfortable,

It is actually good because it can be liberating, you know, that saying that whatever makes a baby cry can also make it get up and go. That sense of that longing propels us to not be completely satisfied where we are. It drives us to seek a new thing. And it pushes us out beyond our comfort zone, perhaps, to seek new things in new ways so that we are not.

We were never created to be static people. We're created to evolve literally and grow just like plants or trees or anything other natural thing around us. So the longing to embrace it and welcome it and not fear it, to utilize it as a motivation to say, okay, this is a discomfort I feel. I want to turn that over to God and in turning it over to God.

I'm gonna seek new ways to relate to it. Not to ignore it, not to try to, you know, fill it by, you know, eating, drinking, whatever too much, but more by sitting with God and offering it to God as a hope of my heart, believing that God will respond. So I don't know if that totally answers your question, but I think in this time of longing to allow it to be welcomed instead of feared,

to be embraced as a hopeful sign of faithfulness, not of emptiness.

Adam Eichelberger (09:21.39)
That's good. And, and one of the things that really stood out to me is you've started us out, with this episode, from, come Emmanuel. And, one of the things that's always been hard for me is in that line, it says that mourns in lonely exile. And you brought that up. And just speaking from my own experience and my own life right now, my family and I have been

Bishop DeDe (09:34.158)
Mm-hmm.

Adam Eichelberger (09:51.402)
working through and navigating a really big loss in our life. And I'm going to be honest, looking at the holiday season and all the stuff that comes along with it, it's kind of a daunting task. So this is a question more for me to you. And hopefully listener, if you hear this or you see this, and maybe this can help with you a little bit when we talk about Jesus being a manual, God with us, what are some ways

Bishop DeDe (09:53.686)
Mm-hmm, absolutely.

Bishop DeDe (10:04.696)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (10:17.165)
Mm-hmm.

Adam Eichelberger (10:20.866)
that we can help him, like embrace him in or invite him into our mourning or our sadness. Because the holidays can, the Christmas time can be hard for a lot of folks. So that's my question to you, Bishop, is how can we invite him into this mourning?

Bishop DeDe (10:29.166)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (10:38.738)
and Adam, such a graceful question, such an important thing, because yes, we can allow Christmas become the season where it's like mandatory happiness. You you will smile, you will sing, you will look pleasant. that is not how God is coming to us. mean, it's important to remember if we're looking at the gospel narrative in Luke and of course, Matthew, Mark.

Adam Eichelberger (10:51.032)
Right.

Bishop DeDe (11:08.806)
and John don't seem to have the same story as Luke about the birth, but in the gospel of Luke, you have refugees, Mary and Joseph, journeying into a foreign land of fleeing persecution, alone and afraid. I can think of few things worse really in some ways than being pregnant riding a donkey. I mean, I'm just saying at full term. That does not seem like a pleasant moment.

And then coming and there's no room at the end. So they're in the cave, the manger was a cave with animals. That is not what we typically sort of talk about at Christmas as, and it was not a super happy, clappy moment. You know, I mean, there was fear and, and isolation and loneliness and lostness and where is God in all of this?

So when we come into to Advent and especially to Christmas with our heart mourning, we're very close to Mary and Joseph. We're walking that path with them. We're sitting with them there in that isolation. And also that's the very place that God comes to us in vulnerability. To think about God could have come in any way that God

wants to come, depends on your, of course, your theology and your Christology, but I, you know, the ruler of the universe and plants and of course, as I figure God could do a lot of things. The fact that God comes to us as a baby, needing care, needing love, a baby that needs to be held and nursed and all the things that babies need, God comes to us in vulnerability and meets us.

in that very moment of mourning. So we're not alone in it. I think the first thing for us is not to cover over our mourning or our sense of loss with some sort of shellacked over false happiness that we can be honest with God and say, you know, right now, not really feeling it. I feel hurt and alone and like, you know, and I think of Mary, especially in a way here, she's had this angel and

Adam Eichelberger (13:15.928)
Right.

Bishop DeDe (13:29.716)
and whatever we want to think about Joseph, here they've had this sense that God is calling them. And in the very moment where she's going to be giving birth, they're not in a five-star hotel. They're not being attended by all these faithful people. They're with the shepherd, you know? And like kind of where's God in this? And then God shows up and says, you know, the most unlikely people show up.

Adam Eichelberger (13:42.756)
All right.

Adam Eichelberger (13:52.601)
Hmm.

Bishop DeDe (13:59.478)
Travelers from Asia minor. mean the you know, of course, let's not conflate those those of you who are listening You just wanted to be upset with me. No the magi is later in the story true They are not at the manger true, but in that time this sense of people coming around them you were unexpected and then throughout the coming weeks and months People coming to them who they would never have guessed were coming to support them who do

Adam Eichelberger (14:11.331)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (14:29.098)
And so I think we do, we also look for the helpers. We look for the people who are around us offering us kindness. We look for those connections where we're not as alone as we may have been. And we know that in those moments of deepest despair, that God is there. And especially if we can't seek out or feel God, that when we reach out to others who are trusted friends and allies, we can find those places of connection.

where we can mourn with a community. And in that, think, find a deeper meaning in Christmas. If we're just singing Christmas carols, and if that's sort of the surface, to really come into Christmas with a sense that God is coming to us in our brokenness, in our addictions, in our sinfulness, in our need for something better than what we're doing. God comes to us with love and divineness.

right in that space of messy human brokenness with redemption and grace. And so the freedom we find in Jesus is so transcendent because it's not put on a happy face. It's no be who you are and know that God is in your being.

Adam Eichelberger (15:49.89)
I think, you know, cause the beautiful thing about Advent and the beautiful thing about Christmas is that it's not just this one off. It doesn't happen one day and done, you know, and it's, and it's bigger than just lighting a couple of candles. It's, this whole season, like you said, that we step into, and we're going to have a lot of time to ask more questions and go deeper into conversations. Cause I think that this begs a lot of questions about things like where are we going to find hope during Advent? How are we going to.

Bishop DeDe (15:58.476)
No, that's right.

Bishop DeDe (16:04.632)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (16:17.592)
Mm-hmm.

Adam Eichelberger (16:19.224)
really step into peace. think that the one thing I wanted to ask too, Bishop, is this. You've mentioned so heavily, you've leaned so heavily into Mary in the story of Advent and in the story of the incarnation of Jesus. And you mentioned the Annunciation and Mary's yes, that fiat of Mary. So my question to you is this, as we are preparing to get into this Advent season, what can our yes look like?

Bishop DeDe (16:39.618)
Mm-hmm.

Adam Eichelberger (16:48.782)
this Advent. I know that's a big question, but what can yes look like for us this Advent season?

Bishop DeDe (16:55.158)
and that's such an essential question. I'm so glad that you asked that because, and I do want to say about Joseph. Joseph has said yes too. mean, Joseph could have said, no way, Jose. You know, in fact started to, I mean, in the gospel narratives, he's like, well, and then he's like, no, this is God working. I'm going to receive this. So our yes, I think begins with a receptive heart. That okay.

Adam Eichelberger (17:04.301)
Right.

Bishop DeDe (17:23.33)
This may not be my plan. I may not like the job that I was told no about, or I may not like the diagnosis I've received, or the loss of a beloved family member, or the way the world is right now. And I can see that God moves all of us beyond death, beyond no's, beyond.

hard times. And so I think our sacred yes is our willingness to embrace what God's really calling us to be. It may be that we have not yet seen in our own lives what we're called to be because we've been so busy doing what we thought we were supposed to do or what someone expected of us. But maybe what God's calling us to do is something beyond that we haven't even dreamed of.

Adam Eichelberger (18:12.58)
Hmm.

Bishop DeDe (18:22.712)
God has a bigger dream for each of us than we could ever think of. The impossibility of God's dream. That even in this broken moment of loss and sadness, that something new is being birthed. We have such finite brains. When we see death, we think it's over. When we see something else, we think, well, that's the end of that. And what God is like, hmm, not yet, because I can still work.

Adam Eichelberger (18:26.98)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (18:52.066)
I can still work with this. I constantly bring a new life. And so I think one way we can kind of help ourselves get to the yes is become more curious and more humble in our own opinion. And be kind of like, well, let's see where God brings life with this. This seems impossible to me. This is like a dead end street, no lights, brick walls. All right, God, knock yourself out.

Adam Eichelberger (19:20.159)
Hahaha!

Bishop DeDe (19:20.686)
You know, and not to be, you know, snarky about, but really to have curiosity and say, somehow God has promised that God is never daunted by endings. So I'm going to look for that light. I'm going to look for the light in the people around for the helpers. Sometimes we're very busy in turning helpers away because we want the help of this particular person or that particular situation. And we overlook

Adam Eichelberger (19:42.787)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (19:51.338)
the gentle graces around us where God is answering our prayers. And so to open our eyes to the ways in which we may be feeling alone and yet somehow people we would never dream of are actually reaching out to us and to look for the helpers, to be a helper. Sometimes the greatest way to overcome our mourning are those places where we really feel

Adam Eichelberger (20:08.472)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (20:19.362)
a lack of energy and lack of power is to do one positive good thing for someone else. To go and volunteer to look at the person at the store and say, how are you? You know, I hope you have a good day too. With generosity and kindness. Now they may respond in ways, you know, they may not be too keen on it, but to offer it, have, to allow ourselves to do a good thing.

for someone else and find ourselves reconnect with our best selves. When we feel connected with our best selves, there's energy in that. So that curiosity to look for where God is at work, the curiosity to think, this is what I thought I needed to do. Maybe God's got a whole new thing. And I will allow myself to be curious about it. Don't have to believe it totally, but I can be curious about it.

Adam Eichelberger (20:54.786)
Mm-hmm.

Adam Eichelberger (21:18.902)
so good, Bishop. Lastly, think the one question, I think maybe the last thing that we can leave with for this episode is what are the things, where are the ways that we can kind of direct ourselves to prepare our hearts and our communities for this Advent, like to receive Jesus? Because sometimes it feels weird, when I was a kid it was like this thing that we, every year it's almost like

Bishop DeDe (21:39.598)
Mm-hmm.

Adam Eichelberger (21:48.386)
He's coming again, but like he's not coming again. Like he's not in the, you know what I mean? Like it's, it's not this thing where it's a new Jesus every year. Like he's getting recycled or something. Boy, that doesn't sound great, but you know what I mean? But what can we do this Advent in our communities and in our hearts to receive Jesus?

Bishop DeDe (21:58.166)
Right.

I do.

Bishop DeDe (22:07.5)
that is such a good question and such a good insight. Because yeah, we know Easter's coming and we know crucifixion is going to, I mean, you know, that's one of the things with the church season year after year is we, know we're going to hear about the passion of Jesus. but in this time to know that this is a new, this is our do-over. Advent is our, mulligan. Advent is our, you know, Advent is, is our, you know, okay.

Let's give it another go. And we talk, you know, in a few weeks, in a month or so, we'll be talking, you know, there'll be New Year's resolutions. Our Advent can be a little bit that. What is our resolution in this new year of the church? This year, I'm gonna have a theme this year in my life, which is pray. And not to tie it too closely to our Lenten Piety, which is, you know, we can always add to our.

Adam Eichelberger (22:37.378)
Right.

Bishop DeDe (23:05.112)
faith life. but to say this year I'm gonna pray each day and this is that's gonna be my way of expressing my mourning and expressing my desire, my hope, my preparation for Jesus is I'm gonna pray or I'm gonna read scripture or I'm gonna I'm gonna finally volunteer, I'm gonna call a friend, I'm gonna do these some of these things, do one thing a week that feels hopeful to me.

And I think when we allow ourselves to really live into that advent season of preparation for Jesus, that it's not just about, I'm gonna pretend that he hasn't come again and this is a new thing, but to say this year.

after the election with whatever my financial situation may be or my relationship situation may be or whatever is alive and happening in my life. In this context, I'm gonna spend some time thinking about what does it mean that Emmanuel has come with, is here with me, that Emmanuel has come to me in this moment. And for some of our listeners, I don't mean to leave out the people who are feeling pretty good and life is clicking along.

Adam Eichelberger (24:16.194)
Mm-hmm.

Bishop DeDe (24:17.586)
in this time when you have the new job and the new relationship and you're feeling really good, Emmanuel, God with you in this moment, how in this moment is our sacred yes being lived out and might we want to live it out? We have an invitation to a do-over. We have an invitation to intentionality. We have an invitation that whatever life may be for us, known and unknown.

that God, Emmanuel is with us and has come to us, that we may be redeemed and no longer alone. And so that is in our Advent piety where I think we find ourselves and where we can find great peace, real peace, real joy, and real joy for the world. Well, Adam, thank you for this conversation, for those listening or watching. I'm so glad to have you be part of this conversation.

As you go from this conversation, I invite you to speak to someone about Advent, to speak to someone about how you're wanting to prepare your heart or your life, and that assurance that God is with us in this time. May you know that you're loved and that God is with you. May you be blessed, and I look forward to seeing you soon.